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Legal / Cliffhanger

The One Minute Play Festival premiered in Seattle in May of 2014, and I was invited to contribute a pair of plays. The time limit was (obviously) one minute each; we were given no specific guidance on theme, other than a hand-waving in the direction of "we want a local connection", and were not given any instruction regarding number or gender of cast members. My two entries are below.


Two friends on chairs, each smoking marijuana joints.

#1: Can you believe this... I mean, smoking joints on my balcony, in plain view. Never thought I'd see the day that smoking joints would be totally legal.

#2: My uncle Carl's still in jail for dealing pot. He's got seventeen more years. Thank god smoking joints is totally legal now.

#1: Don't be a downer. Smoking joints is legal now, gay marriage is legal now...

#2: Yeah, Carl's boyfriend was shot dead when the cops raided their apartment. So they aren't planning a gay marriage.

#1: Oh. Pause. You know what a "buzzkill" is, right?


Two friends meet over a drink.

#1: I wanted to let you know - I'm going to kill myself later tonight.

#2: Oh, really? But could you - I mean, are you sure about -

#1: I know you're gonna be watching -

#2: It's just a really compelling storyline right now -

#1: I know but I staged it so my funeral would be during the hiatus before the back half even airs -

#2: Totally awesome, but - are you sure you wanna miss the mid-season finale? What about Marjorie and her baby?

#1: I know, I know, I thought about that... Long pause. Okay, I can wait until tomorrow to kill myself.

#2: It might be a cliffhanger.

#1: I can wait until next season to kill myself.

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