AIDAN to audience: I had a dream the other night. I was learning how to skydive - practicing on the ground. Mark was there. I hadn’t seen Mark in a long time.

MARK: Is this your first time skydiving?

AIDAN: Yeah.

MARK: You scared?

AIDAN: Nah.

MARK: Why didn’t you jump tandem for your first jump?

AIDAN: I don’t … you can do that?

MARK: Sure, that’s what I did. I had some burly Russian air force dude strapped to my back to open the parachute for me.

AIDAN to audience: And I remember, that was my first alarm bell, like something wasn’t quite right about the situation, but then this training montage started up.

Aidan and Mark lie on their stomachs, practicing the basic skydiving pose, as the Instructor enters.

INSTRUCTOR: Now remember - when you jump out of that plane, immediately spread your arms and legs out wide, as fast as possible. Yes, just like that, boys. You want as much air resistance as you can get. You screw that up, you could go into an uncontrolled spin, black out from the gees, and pow you’re a smear on the ground.

AIDAN sits up: Doesn’t the chute… open automatically?

INSTRUCTOR: What kind of fairytale dreamland are you living in, son? Nothing happens automatically in this world. Your life depends on your own free will, plain and simple.

MARK sits up: I think he wants to jump tandem for his first jump.

INSTRUCTOR to Aidan: Oh do you now.

MARK: Wouldn’t that be safer?

INSTRUCTOR: Of course it would be safer. If you prefer entrusting your life into the hands of a complete stranger for the duration of your freefall experience, I can arrange that. But I thought you were a different kind of man.

AIDAN to audience: Which, I guess that was my second alarm bell, because I don’t really, it doesn’t usually-

MARK: He’s questioning your masculinity.

AIDAN to audience: Which usually, isn’t, a thing with me, or whatever. To Mark: Wait, why are you here anyway?

MARK: Oh, right - funny story, so you remember the last day of college - well, my last day, I guess you had another semester - and that whole big thing in the quad with the marching band and all the, somebody had-

AIDAN: Somebody had fireworks.

MARK: Anyway - I tried to, I wanted to, say goodbye, I thought you, the way you were, the way we were - I didn’t know how to - anyway, I tried to...

AIDAN: You tried to kiss me.

MARK: Yeah. Yeah. But you didn’t…

AIDAN: I didn’t kiss you back. Because, reasons.

MARK: Yeah. Yeah.

AIDAN: So?

MARK: So nothing. I just wondered if you remembered that.

AIDAN to audience: And for some reason, I looked up into the sky, and I saw-

INSTRUCTOR: You think you’re seeing patterns in the clouds, is that right?

AIDAN: It’s pretty weird, actually. It almost looks like - writing.

INSTRUCTOR: That’s because those aren’t clouds at all. Those are chemical trails. Secret messages left in the air by high-flying intelligence drones. Spies in the field decode these messages each day before the trails dissipate, and our enemy is none the wiser.

AIDAN: And what do today’s messages say, do you happen to know?

INSTRUCTOR: They say, “Do not wait for further messages, for this is the last of all days.”

AIDAN to audience: I guess - sometimes people tell you something in a dream that you don’t understand, but you know it’s true.

INSTRUCTOR: A fine day for a skydive if you ask me.

AIDAN to audience: And I guess - I mean, I’d always wanted to skydive, and this was my last chance. And Mark was there.

MARK: You got something better to do?

AIDAN: No.

MARK: You scared?

AIDAN: I mean, maybe.

INSTRUCTOR: Wheels up in ten!

The sound of a small aircraft rises up behind them. The Instructor puts on aviator goggles and a bomber jacket, occupies a seat that has magically appeared and mimes piloting the plane. Aidan and Mark mime holding onto some kind of crash bar inside the back of an imaginary airplane, perhaps sitting on a bench. As the Instructor speaks, Mark slowly peers out an open doorway in the hold of the plane, looking outside and down, anticipating his jump.

INSTRUCTOR: Gentlemen, we’ve just cleared 15,000 feet! Now normally, on a day like today, with clear blue sky as far as the eye can see, normally you’d get a fantastic view of the entire Cascade Range, from Canada to Oregon. We even put that on our web site because normally it’s just a fantastic view up here. Normally today would just be fantastic for visibility.

AIDAN: Why do you keep saying “normally”?

MARK: Aidan, take a look at this.

AIDAN: Why do you keep saying “normally”? What’s, is something different-

MARK: Seriously, you gotta see this.

AIDAN: Is something different about, today, right now, is something not normal?

MARK: Aidan, seriously!

Aidan turns to Mark, then looks out of the plane with Mark, and is awestruck.

AIDAN to audience: And I looked down, and that was my last alarm bell, because I couldn’t - I mean, everyone’s seen, skydiving on video, you know what it’s supposed to look like when you look down from 15,000 feet. But this was, I just, freaked out a little, because-

INSTRUCTOR: It’s the last of all days, gentlemen - there’s nothing normal about it!

AIDAN to audience: I couldn’t see, I mean there was no-

MARK to Instructor: Where’s the ground?

INSTRUCTOR: I have no idea! Normally there’d be mountains!

AIDAN to audience: But all I could see was… clear blue sky… and clouds or chemtrails or whatever… but the runway was gone… and the fields around the runway were gone… the entire surface of the planet was gone, period.

INSTRUCTOR: A fine day for a skydive if you ask me!

MARK: Are you kidding?

The Instructor gets out of his seat and crosses to the open doorway, pushing his way between Aidan and Mark.

INSTRUCTOR: The autopilot will fly the plane true, until she runs out of fuel. I have no idea what happens then - maybe she’ll glide, maybe she’ll spin. Anyway, I won’t be here to find out!

MARK: Where are you going?

INSTRUCTOR: I know there’s probably a good reason for everything that’s happened today. I’ll bet the enemy never saw this coming! But I must admit, just between you and me and the Indivisible Spirit of the Lord Almighty, I sure do wish I’d said a proper goodbye to my wife before I left the house this morning. If this truly is the last of all days, I’ve gotta find her before it’s over. Godspeed, gentlemen!

The Instructor leaps out of the plane and drifts off stage.

MARK: Well, that’s interesting. The ground’s missing but he’s falling anyway.

AIDAN to audience: Which, technically yes, that was interesting, in a Mr. Wizard kind of way, but not exactly relevant, in this other significant way.

MARK: Still want to jump?

AIDAN: Yeah, that’s - why I’m here.

MARK: You scared?

AIDAN: Sure, I mean, of course. Long pause. But I can’t help thinking… it sure would be nice if my first jump was… a tandem jump.

MARK: I don’t think you have the right harness for that.

AIDAN: I’m pretty sure it’s the right harness.

MARK: Anyway if there’s no ground below, you’ll never need to open your parachute. You’ll be perfectly safe just sailing off into the clear blue sky.

AIDAN: Yeah, I guess. But I think I already tried perfectly safe, and that’s - why I’m here.

Mark approaches Aidan from behind, wraps his arms around Aidan as the airplane sound fades.

MARK: Is this okay?

AIDAN: I think so?

They jump - an opportunity for a physical moment, if Mark can lift Aidan into a skydive pose for even a brief moment. Then Mark sets Aidan down and exits. Aidan sits in a chair that has magically appeared, next to the Instructor who had shed his aviator glasses and bomber jacket in favor of a blazer and spectacles. He sits opposite Aidan, acting as Aidan’s therapist; he munches from a box of Sweetheart candies, studying the slogan on each one before he pops it into his mouth, chewing noisily through his upcoming lines.

AIDAN: And then I woke up.

INSTRUCTOR: Do you know what falling dreams mean, Aidan?

AIDAN: No. I mean, I looked on Wikipedia, but clinically I don’t think that’s-

INSTRUCTOR: Falling dreams signify a loss of control in a situation or a relationship. The world around you is topsy turvy. You’re grasping for a hand hold, but reality is not cooperating. Does that feel about right to you?

AIDAN: I mean, maybe.

INSTRUCTOR: Only one thing for it. Give in! Start screaming! Join the circus! I don’t know for sure. Anyway, you can’t trust Wikipedia for a case like this. Every day the pages of Wikipedia are rewritten by intelligent software agents that embed narrative cyphers into the text. Spies in the field decode these cyphers each day before the moderators delete the changes, and our enemy is none the wiser. Anyway, if the ground was truly missing, if there was no planet left to revolve around the sun, maybe that last of all days might actually have lasted forever, understand?

AIDAN: No, I don’t.

INSTRUCTOR: Well, pardon me, son - I’m a skydiving instructor, not your therapist! Pause. Do you like Sweetheart candies, Aidan?

AIDAN: No, I don’t.

INSTRUCTOR: Well, you might like this one.

The Instructor flips a candy to Aidan, then exits. After a small beat, Mark reappears, standing behind Aidan, hands on Aidan’s shoulders.

AIDAN: And then I woke up.

MARK: I was reading - too much B6 can give you really vivid dreams, and I checked, you get like, 845% of your daily allowance in that supplement you take.

AIDAN: That’s interesting, in a Mr. Wizard kind of way. Pause. I’m misremembering, though - it wasn’t your last day of school - in the quad? You came back for a semester.

MARK: It was supposed to be my last day. I decided - to pick up a few more electives.

AIDAN: I see. Pause. And here we are now. Still - freefalling together.

MARK: I guess. Oh, what did that Sweetheart candy in your dream say?

AIDAN: It said, “I’ll bet the enemy never saw that coming.”

Lights fade.